Featured Fundamism: Paying Compliments

WHAT:

Pay a stranger or someone you do not speak with regularly a compliment

WHY:

Dale Carnegie once said, “The kind words you and I say today we may forget, but the recipient just might remember them for a lifetime.” When asking others if they receive enough recognition for the things they do, typically the response is an astounding, NO!!!!!! There is not a soul on the planet that does not enjoy receiving appreciation for the hard work and effort they put forth on a daily basis.

When you pay someone a compliment, you immediately see a change in their attitude. Smiles and a new confidence are usually the result of your kind words. It is not possible to know what everyone is going through in life or where they have been. However, by expressing your gratitude you might give someone the strength they were lacking to get through a difficult time.

While there are many benefits to others by paying a compliment, the benefits to you are countless! Your self-esteem will skyrocket with every smile you help to create with your kind words. Relationships in your life will flourish as you begin to realize what an impact your ability to communicate has on those closest to you. You will start to feel a sense of accomplishment and joy that will help to carry you through even the most trying of times.

HOW:

We have hundreds of interactions with others every day. Accompanied with each interaction is the opportunity to express thanks. You might find that the young man working the drive-thru at your local coffee shop has a pleasant voice. Tell him. You may be surprised by someone who waited several seconds to hold a door for you because they saw you walking up. Express a genuine thank you. Someone at work could be working on a cumbersome project and you notice the frustration on their face. Explain how beneficial their work is and show them appreciation for all of their efforts.

While the “what” in the compliment is important, don’t forget the most critical aspect of giving compliments. You must explain the “why” in order to truly be effective. This can be done by expressing the importance of the recipient’s actions or why they positively affected you.

Below is a brief example of an effective compliment. We will use a cashier from a local grocery store in this example. She greets you with a big smile and asks you how your day is going. She seems sincere in her questions and you can tell that she cares to know the answers. You notice her name badge says, “Stephanie.” You might say something like this…

“It’s not every day that you find someone who takes such great pride in helping others. I just want to say thank you, Stephanie, for caring and keep up the great work!

This fundamism is easy to implement as you have so many opportunities throughout the day. Start with one compliment a day and build upon your momentum. When your confidence starts to grow, increase the number of compliments to two a day. The more smiles you help to create, the better you will feel about yourself and your ability to influence others. Remember there is always a learning curve associated when tackling something new. You could be uncomfortable at first. It’s OK! Continue to stretch yourself and expand your comfort zone. With time and practice, this fundamism will get easier.